Confidence Question

[WyomingRancher]

I need some advice. A while ago I had a horse fall on me and break my leg. Of course I was alone when it happened, and had to ride home with it broken. That happened 15 years ago, and to this day I still worry about a horse falling on me. It's frustrating since I manage to take a lot of "try" out of my horses because I error on the side of caution, and won't let them work to their full ability since I hold them back. My horses have to find this incredibly frustrating!

Don't misunderstand me, I will definately get out and around something if needed, but if I'm not focused on a "job" like that, I catch myself worrying about the horse falling (like when I'm just trotting or loping along to get someplace, or to exercise my horse).

There seems to be some good horsemen on this site, and I thought I'd throw this problem out there to see what people had to say. Any ideas on how to get past this???

[Jassy]

I know how ya feel about not having your full confidence back...My son was helping me work with my new horse, he has head issuess...I've been smacked by his head a few times which makes me headshy too...anyway, my kid said.."mom..if ya own a horse expect to get bumps and bruises"..that's it. A simple fact. It's tuff to get over the fear of getting hurt "again", but I decided that he was right,,,I'm gonna enjoy my horses and if I get hurt once in awhile, I'll hopefully heal ok!

[codymccue]

I think the first thing you need to do is wrap yerself around the fact that it likely won't happen again.
having said that,there are steps you could take to get yer grit back,especially if you ride the same horse most of the time.

A little more about the time you spend in the saddle would help.Are you mostly chasing cows?Might be easier than you think to regain yer old form.

[Big Muddy rancher]

I know how you feel I have been broke up and so has my daughter. It takes time and lots of miles in the saddle to regain that confidence. Time does help but it has to be time spent riding as the longer your away the worse it gets.
I think your doing the right thing by riding but take your time and get to enjoy your time horses back and your confidence will return.

[WyomingRancher]

[Faster horses]

I have been in your situation. You lose confidence in yourself, for sure.
One thing,as we get older, we can't take chanches as we did when we were younger. Lots of people need and rely on us every day...and we don't want to get hurt and not fulfill those needs. So I think what you are experiencing happens to most women eventually.

I too, don't worry when working cows. Nothing has changed, except my mind is on the cow and not on me or my horse.

I have long had a fear of a horse falling with me, for one thing, I don't think I would react quick enough to get out of his way. I'd think, "OH NO HE'S FALLING" and be frozen instead of reacting. I know that because of this, many times I 'take his head away' and that in itself is dangerous. A horse has to have his head to get his balance.

Another thing, have you noticed how some horses trip, and then regain their balance immediately? I feel so safe on a horse like that. But some just really trip and unsettle you. Have you tried riding a different horse to get a different 'feel'? We had a horse that was the greatest to ride; if he tripped, you hardly felt it--he was so 'on his feet' that he gave confidence to anyone that rode him. I detest riding a horse that doesn't know where his feet are.

Is the horse you are riding now, the one that fell with you?

I guess that would be my advice to you today. Try riding a different horse and see how you feel on that one. Some horses do give the rider more confidence than others. And if you can ride one that you are able to quit picking up his head, I think that will help immensely. It did for me.

And some horsemen put on clinics to help with confidence issues. You might try attending one of those. But you probably can't keep doing the same thing over and over expecting different results. So, until I conquer this, I would try not to ride alone.

Good luck!

I'm interested in the other responses you get here.

One more little thing, Pat Parelli again, Butte, Mt. A lady attended his clinic and she had some fear of getting hurt horseback. She insisted on looking directly down at her horses mane. She wasn't watching where she was going and Pat really tried to get through to her that that was a dangerous habit. He didn't want her to get hurt and that is where she was heading if she didn't break this bad habit. She had adopted this habit in trying to deal with her fear. He was able to make her much more comfortable, once she started looking at, and enjoying her surroundings.

This was in 1992, before Pat got so commercialized. He did a lot of good helping people get confident and have fun with their horses.

[WyomingRancher]

Faster horses,

Thanks for your reply.

The horse that happened with has been retired for a few years now, he's 21. In all the years I rode that horse, that was the only wreck we were ever in, and we were on ice when it happened. That's why it's rediculous I still worry about it so much.

I know what you mean by a horse that doesn't know where his feet are. I used to take a friend's futurity horses out to the country to check cattle to let them relax, and some of those things never did take responsibility for their feet.

The three horses I ride now have been great, and know where their feet are. They were raised in open country and know how to watch for holes, and how to handle themselves on rough ground. I've done arena work on them, but mostly they have been ridden out.

Like the lady at the clinic, I too am a "ground watcher." I've been told (more than once ) I do this, but old habits are hard to break! You're right, I really need to focus on this since it would help. Also, I need to bribe people into riding with me that will push me to ride better. I've noticed when I ride with good horsepeople, I step it up. I prefer working by myself, but having someone around would be helpful for this problem.

[codymccue]

your post and faster horses post both go in the direction I was thinkin when I posted...(dern toe draggers)
I think that a little gymnastics over ground rails etc would do wonders.As your horses learn about stride length and placement you will gain your confidence back. a horse learns to lift his feet a little higher and pay a bit more attention when he bumps a few rails.
the paying attention part is a big one here I think,for your peace of mind.

[gcreekrch]

[leanin' H]

Life is way to short not to enjoy being a'horseback! And wrecks will happen now and again, but the reward so outweights the risk. When your riding behind cows or checking salt or fence or lookin' for strays or a hundred other things you do on a ranch, you get the chance to see the world from a persective folks in cars miss out on. You get the chance to watch your ponies ears as he watchs his surroundings. You get to have wildlife linger because they don't recognize you for a two legged critter. You get the cleansing that comes from a surprise summer shower. You get to visit with companions who share your love of the west and cows. You get to see your dog doing what dogs do. You get the chance to bond with an animal that maybe you even had the priviledge to break. You even feel great after a 16 or 18 hour day when your tailfeathers are dragging but since you were a'horseback it don't feel like work normally does. Being astride a horse is what your soul needs to recharge, it's what some people never, ever get a chance to do! Your body will heal when ya scuff it most of the time, but your insides and your heart and your spirit will never take off on a lope without allowing yourself the priviledge, the honor, the pure joy of taking the reins of a horse and seein' where ya end up. Get up, dust yourself off and start grinnin'! Go ridin' and tell us how much ya love it!!!!

[codymccue]

[Faster horses]

leanin H, that was almost spiritual...and so right on the money.

Don't forget the smells, horse sweat, sagebrush, even some weeds when they are mashed into the ground by the horses feet... mmmmmmmmmmmm.